6 January 2010 - Slovakian security

Global aviation security will be vastly strengthened by a new unilateral Slovakian initiative, announced the Slovakian government today. “Bumbling terrorists have sometimes failed to blow up aircraft,” explained suave spokes-spy Meticulous Blndr, “but we can expect them to learn. In this staged plan, attacks will instead be carried out by professional state security forces, who will make no amateurish mistakes. When airport security thwarts every attempt, we’ll have confidence that mere terrorists don’t stand a chance.” Continued Blndr, “In the final stage, we plan to station a warship in the Atlantic to try to shoot down airliners with missiles. We never know when terrorists might develop this capability.”